Caffeinated Cheese anyone?

Ive been thinking....there is a clear lack of creativity in food production. And I think those in charge of all the big mega food corps need my help.

Why no caffeinated cheese? Think of it – you could drink wine and eat cheese and yet never get that sleepy feeling that happens after a glass or two of some good vino. It’s brilliant!!! Now don’t get confused and think “oh, coffee flavoured cheese” – no that is just madness (and grossness?). No, I’m thinking cheese with some caffeine added to it. Mmmmm mmmm delicious!!

They should also make peanut butter flavoured yogurt. They make dessert flavoured yogurt. Even coffee flavoured yogurt! But no peanut butter flavoured yogurt – its a tragedy really.

And Canada should really start importing more of some of the delicacies that the US has access to – but we are sorely lacking. Like the peanut butter Oreo. (Yes, this is the second time I have mentioned peanut butter in this post but can you really be surprised? I AM a peanut butter addict!)


We should also start deep-frying more of our vegetables. During a recent trip to the US I tried deep fried corn. Weird, I know. But oh so good! Why cant we do that with say – peas?

Just some food for thought...ha?

I Run, I Ran, I Hurt....

In my efforts to return to my pre-pregnancy body - such as it was - I have been running and taking a duathalon course.  I do not have a particular talent for either of these things - in fact it is quite the opposite - but I do enjoy a challenge.

Last weekend was the Ottawa Race Weekend in which I have run the 10k for the last four years. Excluding the year I was pregnant of course, when my friends husband ran it for me (and I got my best time ever!!!).  Last year was a bit of a bust.  I hadnt trained and some six months out from giving birth to my lovely boy - I was horribly out of shape.  But this year, oh this year, I trained my tooshie off (as is evidenced by the saggy butt pants).

Race day came around and I felt confident. Oh so confident.  I had NOT factored in that it would be humid. Disgustingly so. But I truly thought I could over come the challenge.

I was wrong. 5k into the race, I discovered that humidity is not good when one has no access to water. Or an energizing refreshment.  All I could think about as I struggled along was how cool the Rideau Canal looked (cool, not clean) and how I would sell my husband for some kool aid.

Finally, I stumbled across the finish line and....lo' and behold....I was seven minutes faster than last years time!! YAYYYYYYYYYYYY.  YAHOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Now - to be able to do it without wanting to vomit.

Maternity Leave-Unemployment

Since Kiernan has been born I have been on, what I like to call, mat leave unemployment.  Though receiving Employment Insurance from the government, I also have no job to return to - thus the term.

This is the first time I have been unemployed since I graduated from University in 1998.  It was depressing then and it is depressing now.  Despite having worked consistently for the last decade (with a few years for a graduate degree) and developing skills which I *think* are quite marketable - I still have not managed to secure a position to go back to in December.

Oh, but I have been looking!  I counted - I have 82 websites which I peruse weekly for new postings.  82!!!!  I have come close to winning two competitions but in the end, they went with folks with other languages. Merd!  Every time I send out a resume, its a little bubble of hope that someone on the other end will find me worthy of a half hour conversation.

What I have learned throughout this process is to be much kinder in the future to those seeking employment. And, in the next lifetime, to be fluently bilingual before graduating high school.

And what has the little one been up to??

While I have continued my cake baking and decorating pursuits - Kiernan continues to grow and learn and generally get cuter by the second. So far - he is still pretty much a quiet guy, but has learned how to make farting noises with his mouth (from his FATHER! I swear!)...
...how to rock a mohawk...

.....as well as a more conservative look...

...dorky hats....

...and dorkier parents!


In all seriousness, Kiernan has grown to be quite the charming little human being. He now has two teeth - bottom of course. He likes to talk and has a wide ranging vocabulary of "ba-ba," "ma-ma" and, "da-da." No crawling or walking yet - and its OKAY!!!! He will get there when he wants to, and he doesnt want to. He would much rather throw food on the ground for the dog and then pull cat fur from their bodies. Ah, boys.

A Summer of Baking

So what do you do when you are on maternity leave and have already organised every cabinet in the house? Bake, of course !!!

Which brings me to - Princess birthday cakes. In August, I was asked by my dear niece to make her birthday party cake. I agreed, but somehow in her mother's mind it became cakeS:

(1) One pink Princess crown cake for the kids' party, and;

(2) One rainbow cake WITH butterfly for the adults' party.

Note: (The butterfly was emphasized over and over and over again by the soon to be 6 year old - so I had to deliver.)

Cake #1: The Rainbow Cake

Friday evening, I made Cake #1.. Charlotte (5 turning 6) and Sophie (2 turning 3) insisted on helping - which I thought would be fun. Ummmmmmmmmmmmm......not so much. Due to their assistance, some mistakes were made. I got totally confused with proportions and ended up having to play with the batter until I felt I was close enough to having it right. 45 minutes later (even though the instructions said it should take 29 minutes) the cake came out and I kept my fingers crossed that it didn't taste like cardboard.

Come Saturday, I began to decorate (Kiernan was bonding with his Daddy). I decided on the blue icing because, as we all know, rainbows are in the SKY (see how creative I am?). I then did the classic rainbow with butterfly (WTF?) with "Happy 6th" written underneath. Why "Happy 6th" you may ask? Well, simply put - I ran out of room. Martha Stewart I am not. Note that the rainbow also looked as though I was drunk while applying. I can attest that I was not, but next time perhaps I should be.

Cake #2: Princess Crown Cake

Using a pan rented from Bulk Burn, I made a mix using two, count 'em TWO, cake mixes. In other words - a huge a$$ cake.

Next up - the rough icing stage, also known as the crumb coat. This was surprisingly difficult as the cake was super soft and 'crumby' (I'm sure its an actual word...somewhere) and the prongs of the crown kept on wanting to break off. At this point there was a lot of swearing at said F*****G Princess Crown Cake.

Then, the coat of pink icing. I believe we were at about hour three of cake decorating at this point. Good thing I had lots of coffee on the go.

Hour four and I started to apply the pieces of candy that the niece had chosen at the store.

And finally - stars are applied and, the nieces name. Grand total of hours contributed towards cake decorating? 5.

Hubby and I then packed up our son and the very large pink Princess cake spectacular to head to the local movie theatre and drop it off for the birthday party. In I went, carrying what seemed like 20 pounds of pink cake. And I wandered....and wandered....and wandered some more. No birthday party. I found the manager, and we wandered, and looked, and put the pink Princess cake into the movie theatre's fridge - and nada. Finally, I called my dear (and very pregnant) sister to confirm the location. Lo' and behold - she told me the wrong movie theatre!!! ARGHHHHHHH!!!!!!

The new walk of shame is carrying a very large pink Princess cake spectacular OUT of a movie theatre.....

The Cakes....Finally!

Postings of cakes!

Cake #1 from the Wilton (We want as much of your money as possible - we ARE a cult!) Cake Decorating Course. I asked Rob what colour cake to make - he said pink - so he got PINK!!!

With purty white flowers no less. Im sure Rob's feminine side was pleased.

Next cake was the rainbow cake - with dark dark depressing clouds as Im so cheery!

I like to think that the butterfly adds a certain element of light and life!

Finally, we have the Plethora of Flowers Cake. And yes, I made all of the flowers out of ICING! Im uber-talented that way....

Now I just wait for the orders to come rolling in.....anyone? ANYONE??

Its August??!?!?!?

A number of folks have been complaining that I have not updated my blog as of late. What? A blog posting every three months isnt enough? Fine. Grumble, grumble.

So, update on the last three months:

Kiernan: He is now loooooooooooooooong, long and skinny! He has outgrown his bouncy chair and his bucket car seat. He can pretty much sit - so long as someone is nearby to catch him when he falls over. He drools. And babbles. And screams. And makes the most lovely farting noises with his mouth.

My Life: Uh, nuttin.' I made a few more cakes - pictures are on the other computer though :( Quit my job and mastered the art of weed killing. I have learned the numerous uses of baby wipes - including dusting and cleaning glass. In sum - I need a new hobby.

So, until some sort of inspiration hits and I come up with some brilliance for this blog (or I find those darn pictures of the cakes on the other computer...) here are some updated photos of the boy.

Kiernan channels Elvis (in Memphis no less...)

Kiernan is oh so impressed with the zoo...

Luckily he still loves the bath....

And, of course, his MOMMY!